Interplantation

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Launchpad

Apple launched their new product today.

My therapist said I am all-too-busy labeling myself. I have recovered mostly from BPD; so why would I blog about being borderline. She said there WAS a book about it - she just could not remember title, author, or anything else about the book.

Keeping a journal is supposed to be good for your mental health. Keeping a dream journal is also good. I have had difficulty with both of them. I followed the directions for keeping a dream journal for a while. Tell yourself to remember the dream before you go to sleep. Then leave some paper and a pencil near the bed so you can pick it up when you wake. Write down the emotion you were feeling during the dream; and the emotion you felt upon waking.

I had a nightmare last night. I awoke quite frightened in a panic. It's been a while since I woke up that way. I dreamed I was in Vermont with my cousins and Aunt Olive. We were along a river. I just watched Defiance. It was similar to THAT river that they have to cross; and they get pinned down on the other side. Some THING was stalking me and trying to kill me. My cousins were helping me not to get killed. They were living on a wooden platform that stood out into the river. Vermont does not have a river like the Susquehanna.

The Bielski brothers hid in the Naliboky virgin forest, which spread for three thousand square kilometers on the right bank of the river Neman.

My sponsor has okayed me to work on my step 4. My therapist wants me to do a step 4 of sorts as well - she wants me to write down my good qualities.

I have done this previously and had some success with it. I wrote a list of 50 attributes. Then I would read them each morning. I would also jog 4 miles a day; and as I was running I would repeat the positive statements to myself. I am respectable. I am respectful. Traci is respectable. Traci is respectful. You are respectful You are respectable. She is respectable. She is respectful.

Gradually, I have been able to replace the enormous amount of negative thinking with positive or neutral thinking. This really helps. The brain is a very powerful tool. Be careful of your negative thoughts.

“Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny."

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Tuesday, January 26, 2010

networked blogs



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Monday, January 25, 2010

NIMH · History of Childhood Maltreatment Linked to Higher Rates of Unemployment, Poverty

NIMH · History of Childhood Maltreatment Linked to Higher Rates of Unemployment, Poverty

Well, as an unemployed, impoverished adult who was mistreated as a child, my life would tend to be another datum to support this.

Overall, adults who had experienced any type of maltreatment in childhood were twice as likely as non-victims to be unemployed.

Wonder if they took a look at gender?

And another horrifying fact of my existence - Maltreatment was also linked to lower rates of health care coverage and greater use of social services such as Medicaid, especially among adults who had experienced childhood sexual abuse.

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/science-news/2009/childhood-maltreatment-undermines-physical-health-in-adulthood.shtml

So I am unemployed and have little health care coverage; but I need to see a lot of doctors for both physical and mental illness and be on a lot of medication because I was sexually abused as a child. Terrific.


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Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Add This

I just added an add this button.
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